Of Senators and Eskimos

Some professional sports teams have racist nicknames. Have you heard of the Edmonton Eskimos, the Atlanta Braves, the Washington Redskins, the Cleveland Indians and the New York Jews? O.K., I made up the last one.

Then there is the hockey team known as the Ottawa Senators. It did pretty well in the Stanley Cup playoffs, being eliminated only in the seventh game, in double overtime, in the semi-final round against the Pittsburgh Penguins. So, what’s wrong with the “Senators”? Wait a minute. Are you serious? Do you really have to ask?

What team would want to be named for an institution made up of corrupt, non-elected, party fund-raisers, elitist influence peddlers, and re-cycled Canadian bourgeois politicians?

But think about it.  The political Senators could field a memorable hockey team.

Let’s start with Don Meredith, a 52-year-old preacher and Stephen Harper appointee who plays right wing.  He really knows how to score on 16-year-old young women.  Meredith just “retired” with a big pension after “playing” only six seasons.

Then there are current Senators Patrick Brazeau, Mike Duffy, Mac Harb and Pamela Wallin.  Aren’t they terrific penalty killers?  They claimed travel and living allowances for which they were not eligible.  But they played such good defence that they avoided criminal charges.  In fact, of the thirty Senators investigated by the RCMP, only a few re-paid monies they purloined.

Despite everything that’s happened, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau wants to keep the Senate as a home team on Parliament Hill.  I guess it’s because he has season’s tickets. Personally, I think the Senators’ moniker should be replaced by something more truthful.

How about the “Ottawa Thieves?”